it's bigger than you

There's a problem I run into from time to time. We use a lot of words to varying effect. Sometimes we conjure up wise old relics with our usage, and it is there that the idea conveyed is bigger than you.

This is when something strange happens. You are quickly alienated from yourself. Perhaps you spoke in a way that makes you appear 'too big for your britches.' Perhaps you spoke in a way that makes you appear more foolish, more bigoted, prejudicial, or otherwise unsavory even to yourself. There's no reason that this should occur other than it does, and it demonstrates how rhetorically weaponized meaning happens through our uncovering of history with words, our invading of homes with our words, our invasion of the interior lives of others with our words.

How violent can an "I love you" be? When it achieves an absolute measure of death as its ending. Can or should anyone love that much? Is it fair to you or to me? It's as the author in the book lying next to me would say, slavery to formalism. We become enslaved to a lot of things. An idea in our head seems like an unworthy king for a court of one. When we function in a world on the basis of our idea of that world then perhaps this king leads none. Ideas are, in fact, no things. Yet we invest so much in them that we'll fell a forest for the greater glory of this no thing. And what better way to demonstrate it's no potential than for this no thing to command an army and obliterate something, to erase it totally from existence. This notion of erasure is a sacrifice upon the altar of no things.